Just another day

I missed working out yesterday so today was a double up. With the Holidays and all its been a bit crazy. I miss my regular work out buddy but I have had time with other friends too. I love helping people (not that I really Know what I am doing).

I have been having fun. Now I have to get back on track with my eating. 20 pounds seem like forever. I wish I could loose it like I lost the first 100. I just feel like eating everything.

I dont know if it is depression or just giving up. Seems much easier to throw the towel in.

I know I have come so far and I need my will power back. I am still faithfully going to the gym, but eating bad doesnt do a thing. 

I have to remind myself MANY times how to eat. So tomorrow is a new day and there are less sweets in the house. These Carbs are a killer though. I feel like crap because of my eating. All the sugars just make me feel so bloated and fat. I know what I have to do, now just to do it.

Please when you have a chance please pray for me. I need some of my ambition back.

Mirror, Mirror

Mirror, Mirror

When I look in the mirror, I see nothing has changed.  100 pounds you would think the change would be huge. Well, its not to yourself. I know I am not the only that feels that way. One reason I think it is important to keep a before picture.

Looking in the mirror, I see my same round face and unorganized body.

What do you see when you look in the mirror?

I pray everyday to give me the eyes of my husband.

He sees me and beautiful and I see myself as Not beautiful.

He sees my weight loss and I see myself not down a pound. 

He sees me from the inside out and I see myself from the outside in.

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall.......

It makes me depressed looking at myself, and I want to add Depression is a real, very real thing.

I can cry a whole day over stuff like MYSELF.

Would you call that Insecurity?

Or just Fat Eye Glasses?

Maybe just use to what you are always looking at.

Now If I hold a now picture and an old picture then I can see the difference, I don't feel different. 

Maybe the mirror adds 10 pounds like everyone says.

So if you are working on weight loss, make sure you have a before picture. 

Sometimes the only way to notice is to see the past!

One Roll at a Time

New Workout Friend

Today I went to work out with another friend. She signed up and is on her way to a healthier life style. It is all a mind set as she says. We have to change one mind set at a time. It is not a diet or working out. Lets say eating healthy or clean eating, or it is our play time. 

We have to change our bodies "One Roll at a Time"

Today was my leg work out day but we did abs. I hope I didn't hurt her to bad. She learned a lot today and I believe she enjoyed it. I hope she enjoyed it at least.

I think when you work out with someone else it makes it easier to get through the "Playtime". It may be a way to push yourself more. It is best to have an accountability partner. Having more than one is even better. I like to have others to go with when my main partner cant go. I always say "More the Merrier".

I went to the gym today. Did my workout with Nicole. Some days you just don't feel like doing anything. I showed up physically but mentally not to sure. It was arms day.

We figure if we show up at the gym and did some things, then that is further a head than sitting on the couch.

Now tonight my abs are starting to get sore from yesterday. No Pain No Gain.

I am laying here in bed wondering what to write about. I am trying to warm up because it is so cold out in the barn milking and doing our chores.

My feet are FROZEN!

Taking someone new for a ride at the gym tomorrow and talk to her about measure, weight and pictures. You regret if you don't do any of them. I like to see progress in one area to keep me motivated. So I downloaded a measurement chart to share. 

a

The second chart is the measurements I use. I hope you can find one you like or can print off the ones I posted on here. 

Make sure when taking pictures you do front, back and side. When you do a second picture make sure you wear the same clothes. 

Someplace there will be a difference to keep you encouraged. If you have any questions please ask. I will do my best to answer you.

How Bad Do You Want It?

I know I have not written much. Dealing with my own let downs and falls. I should write about them but it is super hard. I have not lost anything for sometime. I have been up and down the same 5 pounds and loosing my mind. I saw the above quote and asked myself: "How bad do I want it?"

Maybe that is my problem, I am getting to the point where I am sorta satisfied where I am when I really am not. I want more. 

Are we ever happy?

I do want to hit at least 165 pounds and between 172-177 is my hang out. 

How bad do I want it?

I do want it! I need to yell, I WANT IT! There, now I really want it right?

 Have to keep starting over again and again. It will be a battle for the rest of my life. Changing the way you eat is very hard and have to learn to keep it going. I have a few accountability partners and a husband that is encouraging. 

Like I say, I have to keep on keeping. Want to give up but every morning is a new day and a new way. Lets keep working hard all together and learn to change our eating lifestyle.

I often get asked "How are you doing it?"

Not often do I get asked WHY I am doing it but a couple times that has come out of the mouths of people. My answer will always be the same. To be healthier for myself, kids and husband. I am not on a diet I am on a healthy eating change. So how am I doing it? The old way, eating clean and not all the processed and sugars.

Well today is "Workout Wednesday" so another name is "Pump Day"

ABS was it for me.

My trainer has us doing Arms on Monday, Legs on Tuesday and Abs on Wednesday and start over again. I have been going to the gym 5 or 6 times a week. Not seeing any Changes except in the shape. Maybe my fat will start melting off slowly. I made my fat cry today. I was on the arc trainer for 30 min and went 1.62 miles.

9 Months of a healthier lifestyle does this!

Heading to the barn so this is the end of my post. Hope you enjoy the rest of your day!

We Can!!!

 Just keep on Keeping!

I'm sorry its been so long. I have been at such a stand still for everything. I guess its good I am not gaining weight. 

Kelli measured me before she left for Florida and would be gone 10 weeks. She also took pictures, I have the pictures to show what 5 weeks of dedicating 6 days a week to the gym.

To look at these pictures make me want to keep it up. Had no idea it is real. 

When you look at yourself everyday, You just don't notice.

So DO NOT give up. You might not see it but I am sure others do. 

I started a support group type thing. An app where we all can talk and have support. Want to join? Need to let me know. I expect people to check in regularly.

Know with hard work, shear dedication you can do anything.

Please go back and read my story if you dont think you can. Trust me I thought there were magic pills and diets out there. NO there isnt. You have to want it so bad you can taste it. 

Days Gone By

Its been way to long. I have not been in the mood to update. I have not lost a pound and seems to be at a stand still.
I have to keep going forward, but some most days are hard anymore. My eyes are getting sleepy and I am not sure what to write. If you want to read anything give me a topic. have a great night.

Slowing Down

Waiting for the farm stuff to slow down. It is not happening yet.

The Challenge is here. I am at a stand still since fair. Going between the weights of 173 - 175#s

Im not stopping. I changed up my exercise routine. You can now find me at #PlanetFitness every day!

Still eating what I want before 2pm. Life gets tough for sure. 

Dont give up. You hold your head high because you got this far already. 

1# or 100#s; you still did it.

always

The last thing I'm gonna say is:

YOU ARE AWESOME AND KEEP IT UP, YOU ARE HELPING YOURSELF AND YOUR FAMILY MAKING YOURSELF HEALTHY!

(You are not Dieting)

Oh so Tired

Here I am again. So tired with so many ideas. We have been busy here on he farm. Getting ready to chop corn. Once we slow down, it will be much easier to type. 

Not sure if I had covered this but the famous Question keeps coming up!

WHAT DIET ARE YOU DOING?

Well Dairywoman Diet is what I am calling it now. 

I get up and make a smoothie to take to the barn. The Smoothie has to have a green, flax seed and Coconut oil in it.

I will sometimes take a fruit to the barn also.

If I feel up to it, I might snack on grapes or crackers.

Lunch is fruit, veggie and protein, Sometimes I will have a carb too. This is the last chance at a carb for the day.

I once again Snack on anything.

Dinner time a fruit, veggie and protein again. NO CARBS!

After we are done milking, I will grab something small and have a glass of chocolate milk.

Chocolate milk is super good for you and he healing of your muscles.

I think I am way to tired. I may add more another time.

Sugar?

Not Sugar, Babe!

Sugar is one of our worst enemies. Lets think how much sugar we eat.

Spices you put in your food, I would say 70% of the prepackaged spices and seasonings are mixed with sugar.

There are natural sugars in food and added sugar in food. We should only have 6 grams of sugar a day. That is out done with a pop. I am sure you just don't have one pop either.

Make sure you check everything before it enters your mouth, Especially if you don't make it.

Slowly cut it out of your diet. Dont just stop. You will go through some rough withdrawals. 

Cut out one type of sugar a week. That will help plus you dont know where are all the sugars are. 

I cant think much more to say on this topic.

Please if you have any questions or comment, let me know. 

I will do my best to answer them. 

Weight: 175

*Inches: up 1 inch. (i will look it up tomorrow)

*I measure Neck, Arm, Chest, Abdomen Waist, Thigh, and Calf. My inches will be the total. I am going to try to post it as much as possible.

currently I have stayed with in 2 pounds of 174. I think I have hit a hard pleatu and I just may stay here for a bit. Let my skin catch up. I started at 292 five years ago.

Lets talk "Words"

What you say to me sometimes is not always the greatest.

Lets think!

Wow! Don't you think you have lost enough?! I think you are loosing to fast!

I never knew you were that big!

Are you eating?

How can we change this, so it doesn't sound like this.

Please be supportive of me loosing weight. I have a husband making sure I am eating and healthy as I am working my butt off to do what is best for me and my family. 

I have a goal to hit. That would be the number of 160.

Do you think that is low enough or not?

Does it matter?

Maybe I want to go lower.

My BMI weight should be 125, What would one say to me then?

How much should be lost in a week?

Do you have any idea what is safe?

I been stuck between 174 & 176 for the last 2 weeks, is that bad?

No it isn't. My body is adjusting to all the changes that are taking place. I am allowed to gain and loose. I am allowed to loose up to 2 pounds a week and be safe.

Well I guess if I felt "that BIG", I am changing things now.

I love to eat so YES I am eating! Don't you think Shane would say something if I wasn't.

Maybe if I had all kinds of bone sticking out then maybe you can question me.

When people say those things to me I start to wonder if they are jealous.

Is that wrong that I start to think that?

NOPE! 

Continue I makes me feel better now.

When Someone is loosing weight and you are close with them, Maybe tell them something you notice.

I love when someone says to me, Wow! your face looks skinnier.

My husband says the greatest things ever.

When he told me today how Proud he was of me and that a year ago I could never have pulled this outfit off. THAT MADE ME FEEL GREAT!

9/18/16

8/2014

8/2014

2015

 

Not everyday is a loss

Losing and Winning

Oh boy! Some days I really feel like giving up. A few people asked why I haven't posted. Well We had fair and it has been crazy! I had multiple times opened up a post and never got to it.

We wont always be perfect.

That goes for weight loss too. Can not be discouraged because of a gain.

That is a sign to get on the horse and maybe ride a different pace.

Change something up. If you are working out, I could be muscles. 

I have thought many times the last week or so about giving up. Life gets in the way and gets really hard.

I have support that I can turn to or knows me well enough to know something is off.

Find yourself someone that understands you. 

You need someone to tell all the great news that will get excited as you are.

You need someone that you can tell all the crap to and will give you a hug and help you move on.

You need someone that can tell you when you are wrong or something is wrong.

You need to be CONFIDENT in yourself that YOU can do this.

  

Today is one of those days. I just gave up and gave in. I ate things I should not have.

I drank pop and tea. So now tomorrow when I get on that scale, I will cry.

Tomorrow is a new day.

I FAILED miserably today. 

Its ok. We make it right. Thank you to my Friends (you know who you are) that call or text at that perfect time. 

If it wasnt for them, Not sure where I would be.

Make sure you have that somebody.

You can even write me. I will be excited for you, Cry with you and give you the boost you just might need. Take it one day at a time and just believe.

So for now, I am done. I let you know that i mess up and will resolve it again and again.  

Next topic is "what not to say to me"

Barn Basics

Barn Basics

Exercise anywhere!

Any type of movement above what you do regularly is Exercise.

I found that in the barn it was easiest for me. I am there about 6 hours a day.

Kelli hooked my rubber bands around the beam in the middle of the parlor. So many things I can do.

I use the wall to do push ups, yes it is a cheating way but my arms and stomach feels it. 

I plank too. I started and only could go for 12 seconds now i can go over a minute. 

I do squats between each group of cows. 

I do mock pull ups with the rubber bands and I feel almost ready to attempt a real one.

Since July 4th, when I started to do my Barn work out I have lost a total of 23 inches.

I have lost 17 pounds also.

I feel so much better and I think it gives me more energy.

 

Work in an office make sure to get a few things done. When you go to sit back down; do a squat first.

Walk at lunch. Even if it is 5 minutes, just don't sit the whole time.

I am sure you can find Ideas on pintrest.

 Working out and MOVING has made so many things better about me.

I know I am more confident in my walk. I walk with my head higher.

When I speak I feel more sure of myself.

I know I am starting to look better because it is always proof to me when Shane looks at me with a smile.

He has always said how beautiful I am, but I was always hiding it.

It is amazing how much I can do without loosing my breath.

I feel as if I am stronger and I am not lifting, I am using resistance. I dont want to be bulky just have some shape to me. 

I think working out helps me want to eat better too! It all works together.

 Please start now. It is not to late and dont say You will tomorrow. Make time to better your health TODAY!

Leave me a comment if you find an exercise that you can do without any equipment. You can maybe help motivate others. It doesn't take long but adds more time to your life.

I have Knees

 I have Knees

I know today's title sounds funky, but its the truth. I notice my knees have form tonight.

I am now down to 178 pounds. This is crazy and amazing. 

What I thought was impossible is now possible.

I have noticed many different things that I could not do or see before.

I can touch my toes when I am standing.

I had my phone in my back left pocket in the barn and I could reach it with my right hand.

I can breath when I bend over.

 So today I noticed my knees had form and not lots of extra around it made me really see.

Today I was asked how I eat.

First it is mostly not processed food. All fresh and only a few ingredients.

So my schedule is different than most.

I get up at 4:30AM to milk, so I grab my water and make a smoothie.

Smoothie consist of at least one fruit, Kale, Coconut oil, ground flax seed, Chia seed, sometimes protien and milk. I will also take fruit, Apple, peach or banana to the barn.

If I get hungry before lunch time I eat fruit or veggie. Remember I never say No, Just eat slow.

Lunch can be a carb, so maybe a sandwich with LOTS of veggies and anything else I want. I only eat that and water. I eat slowly and I am usualy full before it is even gone.

I dont eat carbs after 2pm.

Dinner for instance would be hamburger and fries.

My burger I fix with ALL the things I want without the bun. Use a for and knife to eat. 

Fries is carrots cut like fries and in olive oil pan fry or bake. Love that for a replacement for fries.

I then don't eat after evening milking so 4pm is the last time I eat.

If I get hungry after milking I will drink a glass of milk and eat a handful of blueberries. 

This is and idea of how I eat. I dont crave carbs like I use to. 

Please if you have questions, send me a message. I will answer them directly but may add it to my blog. 

Monday I will get my measurements and weight. 

Have a Blessed night.   

Rough Days

Days Can Be Rough Wicked Bad

Today was one of those days. You feel like crap just because. My eating just wasn't right and now I am Starved. 
To much running through my head.

Yesterday I gained 2 pounds and this morning I was back down 2 pounds 
I ate better yesterday, I gained because I didn't eat the day before. 
Now I think I might gain again. 

2 years ago

Fair starts in a week and I am not ready.
School started and I was not ready. 
Life is happening and I feel not ready.

Do you think your mood and attitude affects your weight?
Are you a Stress eater? 
How about a closet eater?
 I have been both, now I clean when I am stressed. 
We will see how I do when I wake up tomorrow. Gotta close my eyes. 

So So tired.  

What Counts?

 What Counts?

Do you go by your scale or measurements?
When loosing weight, what do you like to see?

I have been doing both. I know the measurements tell more truth.
I have an app on my phone called "Happy Scale".
I weigh myself everyday at the same time. I like to do it this way so I can
keep on top when I mess up my eating.

Since June 12, 2016, I have been using the app. I have lost 19.6 pounds.

Since July 4, 2016, I have lost 18.75 inches off my body.

Both are good numbers in my book. I always have to remember that as I am working out
muscles weigh more than fat. Muscle burns fat.

The way you loose you need to feel good. Don't be all crazy about numbers.
We all loose differently. Have to find out the best.

Starving yourself makes you either gain or stay the same. So you have to eat to loose weight.
Watch what goes in your mouth and how much. This is not a diet. IT HAS TO BE A LIFE CHANGE.
Diet is like my husband says, If you want to loose 10 pounds because you are going to the beach for vacation.
To keep the weight off you need to CHANGE how you eat.
I have a goal of 160 pounds. If I get there and want to loose more, I will work on it.

I can say back in the day I was 292 pounds and that was about 5 years ago. I have been up and down trying all kinds of ways to loose. I was obsessed with the scale. Then I would get disappointed and just give up. The pills cost so much money to do it their way but does it really work.
I dont have the money to spend on all the "Special" things to loose weight.

I am thankful I have found a happy medium measuring myself every 2 weeks and weighing myself everyday.
Find the best for you. Can't bring yourself down. Have to know there will be always ups and downs. Cant give up and don't just go by the scale. Its all how you feel.

Dieting?

I am not dieting, I am changing me!

Foods, What food are you? 

Do you realize they put so much stuff in food? 

Do you know what is in your food?

Why add colors to your food?

Can you say the ingredients in your food?

Well lots of questions. Check your food over. Just cutting out all the additives to the food can drop pounds. 

Most people eat the fat free food or Low fat. If you look at how it is made; you might not want to eat it. Most of the time the sugars are a chemical based sugar (man made) and it is more addictive. This is why you eat more or gain weight. The "fake" sugars make you want more.

Colors, do you see that your food doesn't look like the natural food? Red 40 is in all kinds of food, even Cheese, like Colby.

Because of our son and my ADHD we have cut out 99% of food dyes. I feel different and you can see the difference in our son when he has it. I researched about 2 years before fully understanding. I do my best to either make the food or look at ingredients. Rethink the colors of your food. Mac and Cheese in the box use to be no dyes and then went to the dyes because it is more appealing to look at, in turn makes us eat more.

Kind of crazy the way it works but, hey that is what they do. 

There are other ways to get coloring for food, even to dye eggs for Easter. Food in the natural state can make some pretty great colors. You boil and strain the food, and BAM you have natural food coloring.

Making sure you are aware of the ingredients going into your mouth will help with any kind of weight loss.

I think if you care enough you will allow for extra time. People say it takes so much time and money. YES it does take time but everything GREAT takes time. You might pay a little extra now but if you eat less and have less medical issues you will actually save money.

One pound at a time, one day at a time and one food at a time.

Don't change everything at once, Change one thing every 2 weeks and it will make the transition much easier.

Have to think about what you buy and eat. Once you catch on, things get much easier. So just don't give up, you will feel much better in the end. Every day is new and Every Day I start over. I have to have those days I eat what I am craving, but I make sure I really want it. Eat or drink it slowly and be done when you are not sitting there wanting so bad anymore. 

My Saying for myself is  

"Never say no just go Slow!"

 what I am saying is, I don't tell myself I can't have because I will only want more. I just say eat it slow and I usually don't even eat the whole thing.

Quick Note

Sorry been so busy. I want to post what I am doing to  loose weight.

1. I eat a Fruit, Veggie, and Protein for every meal!

2. I keep moving all day.

3.  Kelli added my exercise band into the barn. I work out at least once a day in the barn.

4. DON'T GIVE UP WHEN YOU MESS UP!

5. Take measurements because you can loose inches and gain weight if you are creating muscles.

Just keep working and you will get where you want. There is no magical fix for weight loss. Trust me I know. I have tried EVERYTHING!

In the Begining

Not sure where to begin!

I moved from Michigan in 1999, and that is a hard thing to do. I did not know anyone and started to get lazy and depressed. It is hard when things change so much. 

Love living here and having a married life, but there must have always been the one thing in me.  Depression!! You do not even know you have it. That fake smile goes on and you make it look easy when you are dying on the inside. I was getting so heavy and I didn't know what way to go. 

Many diets and excersizes I could never stick to! I was looking for the easy "Weight loss Pill" or "Easy Trick" (No such thing)

Fast Forward after 2 kids....

292 Pounds is my heaviest.

Pulling this picture out, my kids didnt even know it was me. 

My dream has always been to do a 5K. Well at this weight there was no running involved in that race. I don't have to win but I want to be able to run/jog the whole thing. 

I told Kelli and she said she would work with me. Well it is very hard for me to do things in front of people because I am so heavy. She was such an encourager. I thought I never could run with my asthma but she got me understanding how to work through it. So in November we started with like jogging 15 feet and walking then jogging and me nearly passing out. She held my had and got me working through mental thoughts and physical walls.

Now I am able to go out and jog. Still cant do a whole lot but my minutes started at 29 min mile and now i am at about 12 min mile. That is HUGE for me.

I started to change somethings on how I was eating and tried hard. But I would hit a wall and not loose a pound and just quit. Many times this has happen in the last 3 years.

With in the last year our son was being evaluated for some things going on in our lives.

I was in with a session with him and the Doctor asked me if I had ever been tested for ADHD. Well I was super upset because we were trying to get Collyn on the correct path and here he is talking about me. Upset I talked to Shane and we thought maybe it was a good idea to get tested. I went through 3 weeks of tests and come to the conclusion, Im Depressed, severe ADHD, OCD tendencies and Sensory Issues.

OH MY GOSH!!! NOT ME!!!

Shane said he wished he knew this many years ago because maybe it could have saved some hassles the last 18 years. Now he is learning how to deal with this for both myself and our son.

Been working on my diet with taking out processed food and that has helped. I am also on  medince for Depression and ADHD. What a difference on my focus and being able to do things. 

Now I am very focused on what goes in my mouth and I try to stay busy. Well as a Dairy farmer I guess there is not a day that isn't busy. So this will be where I log my days. I am not good at getting on the computer but I will do my best. 

I am now down 100 Pounds. Feels good and I can do so much more. 

100 Pounds lighter means I lost my 10 year old daughter off my body!

So maybe follow me and we will have things to work through. I wont be perfect but I am doing my best. I hope this encourages someone to loose weight the correct way because there is no Magic anything to do this.